New - new hair

Yesterday I received my second chemo treatment -- it went very well, blood work is right on target, health-wise I'm right on top of the charts.

it is a long process. It starts at 9 a.m. and it goes until 5 p.m. My sister Blanca drove in from L.A. again to be with me. She is such a great support -- she spoils me when she is here. I do have to say that although I never really had a problem breathing prior to being diagnosed, and I don't really know if this is psychological or the chimo is actually shrinking the tumors, but I feel as if I can breath deeper, better. Whatever the case, I feel really good.

My hair has finally fallen out ( most of it ) it started gradually which I though it could be something I could handle -- but then more and more was falling out until one night while shampooing it -- it all just fell out, just like that, I was so not prepare for that --- I cried for a long time as I tried to vacuum my precious hair off the bathroom floor -- there is just no way of describing that feeling -- it took me long while before I could look at myself in the mirror. Lucille happen to call at them moment, we talk and I felt better -- the next day, Lucille, Tiffany and I went to a wig shop and pick out new hair -- I really like my new wig -- I think it looks pretty natural -- who knows? I can see some possibilities, maybe other styles, other colors and why not other personalities. I think I can have some fun with this!!!

Thank you again to all my angels and pillars -- I could not do this without you -- your positive vibrations, thoughtful actions and prayers empower me to overcome each obstacle. I draw my strength from each of you. I love getting your e-mails and comments, please keep them coming. I'm trying really hard to maintain emotional, spiritual and physical balance and I know that with the grace of God watching over me and all your help I can do this!!!

I do have to share one more thing, When my Dr. told me the news I don't think I heard everything he was saying, after the initial shock, my brain just stopped processing, but I do remember something he said "this is a gift you may not want, nonetheless, it is a gift" I did not understand what he was saying to me then, I do now. Each and everyday, no matter what day of the week, I live it as if it was my last one, and I have learned to appreciate each and every moment, specially with my children and the people I love. Now I understand what my doctor was saying. I want to live the rest of my life that way. As traumatic as this illness is, I find myself really happy over very little things, fortunate and grateful, always grateful.

By the way, my sister Blanca shaved her beautiful curly hair just before she left back to L.A. today, so that I would not feel so bad for losing mine. I love her and the support she gives me.